Locals Assured They'll Only Need To Cut Showers To 3 Minutes And Stop Flushing Wees If Proposed Data Centre Goes Ahead
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The residents of Betoota's sprawling Plains district have today been given some reassuring news.
The Nation
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Nathan Lyon Suggestively Raises Eyebrows And Smiles When Chat Turns To Who Should Be Captain
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The nation’s Wattle Holder Nathan Lyon has sheepishly put his case forward to
PM Says Aussies Are Sick Of Having Anyone Showing The Slightest Bit Of Leadership In Their Lives
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Just 72 hours before he discreetly backed State Leader for implementing jab mandates for certain industries,
Annastacia Sounds The Flood Drum To Rally Mud Army As QLD Prepares To Break Rainfall Records
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For the first time in over a decade, The Queensland Premier has had to make the
Gladys: “I Always Followed The Best Oh Fuck It, I Couldn’t Give A Fuck Anymore”
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The former Premier of New South Wales, Gladys Berejiklian, has told reporters in Sydney
Aussie Hospitality Sector Cheers As Nepali Visa Workers Arrive Like Allied Forces At Normandy
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Starting today, 200,000 visas for skilled migrants and students have been made available to boost
Man Wonders In What Spectacular Fashion The Prime Minister Will Fuck Something Up This Week
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The club captain of the Lake Betooa Surf Lifesaving Club has told The Advocate
Odd Assortment Of Stolen Pub Glassware Fair Indication He’s Not Ready To Settle Down Yet
TRACEY BENDIGNER | Culture | Contact A local girl has had her suspicions confirmed this evening after opening up the glasses cupboard
3-Ply TP in Guest Bathroom Fair Sign Mate’s Parents Are Loaded
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT‘ A local man enjoyed a porcelain ponder this morning, hypothesizing about just how rich
Cafe Staff Acting Like They’ve Been Asked To Split An Atom Instead Of A Bill
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Local cafe staff might be expecting a Nobel Science Prize in the mail after attempting to
Local Woman Hesitates In Front Of Favourite Store In Fear Of Being Relentlessly Pursued By Teenage Floor Manager
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT As local woman Natalie Stanton makes her way through the CBD and towards her favourite store,
Local Bloke Finds Himself Drunk Enough To Eat Rubbery Slice Of Pizza From Kebab Shop Hot Box
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT The familiar grease stain of a night well spent has been identified by Betoota resident Jeremy
Country Town Hospital In Wine Region Not Struggling For Rural Placements
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The once-struggling Channel Country General Hospital in Bedourie is reportedly sorting through a backlog of