Locals Assured They'll Only Need To Cut Showers To 3 Minutes And Stop Flushing Wees If Proposed Data Centre Goes Ahead
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The residents of Betoota's sprawling Plains district have today been given some reassuring news.
The Nation
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29-Year-Old Blows Weekly Budget Taking Mum To Extravagant Lunch To Prove He’s Got His Shit Together
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT “Ohhh that’s nice, what do you call this?” asks the visiting suburban matriarch. Jason wipes
Dutton’s Defamation Trial Finds That He Has Feelings, And He Doesn’t Like Them Being Hurt
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s Defence Minister has today succeeded in getting 35,000 dollars out of an
Last Remaining CSIRO Scientists Rush To Show Queen Jacqui Some Reports On This Climate Change Thing
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT After making headlines for sticking it to the major parties and One Nation, Jacqui Lambie has
Bureau Of Meteorology Declares Hot Girl Summer To Be Postponed Until 2022
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT In sad news, the Bureau of Meteorology has today declared that hot girl summer is postponed
Independent Tassie Senator Displays More Energy And Leadership Than Both Major Parties Combined
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As another run-of-the-mill week of politics chugs along, Jacqui Lambie has once again
Townie Kid Suffers Crippling Stage Fright After Bloke In Commodore Tells Him To Do A Wheelie
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local Betoota Downs kid, Alby Sherwin (13) has today been overwhelmed with an intense bout of
Flag-Wearing Patriot Suffers Existential Crisis After Realising Scotty Is Actually Full Of Shit
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Deep in thought as he stares out into the Big Blue Bin off Sydney,
PM Lies And Says He Told Albo Of His Plans For Hawaii Holiday He Tried To Hide During Bushfires
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Yesterday, The Betoota Advocate started the week with an exciting news story that investigated the rapidly
Brisbane Real Estate Agent Forecasts A Bitta Snow On Friday Too If Ya Know What I’m Sayin Boys
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT A Brisbane real estate agent has today shown he may have a career in meteorology, by
South Australia Now Open To Regular Australians That Don’t Have Creepy Accents And A Penchant For Heinous Crimes
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The whole country is closer to being one today as South Australia welcome back
Pope Francis Walks Out Of Interview With Ch7 After Reporter Admits He Hasn’t Read The Bible
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT After a rough 24 hours, Channel 7 has taken another hit today, with a second high-
Anti-Vaxxers Cut The Bullshit And Rush To Get Jabbed After Being Yelled At By A Fed Up Jacqui
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The 2% of Australia that are ideologically opposed to immunisations have suffered a shattering blow to