Most Racist Bloke In Town Always Seems To Have A Missus That Isn't The Same Race As Him
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT One of the loudest blokes at the South Betoota Plains Hotel has today been forced to
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Arnotts Insist Iced Vovos Have Always Been The Size Of A Postage Stamp
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Arnott’s has come forward to address complaints of their beloved Iced Vovos after
Local Bloke Barely Cops A Hello As Mate Makes Enthusiastic Beeline Towards His Dog
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact There’s been some irrational feelings of jealousy brewing in Betoota Heights today, as a local
Footy Trip Lads in Airport Queue Treat Fellow Passengers to Play-By-Play Recount of How Rogue Mate Got Arrested
KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACT A long airport queue has been given some colourful entertainment today, as a group
Chronically Online Dipstick Putting Emojis Over Their Kid’s Faces Could Just Not Post Pictures Of Them
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Betoota Heights internet personality and profound dipstick, Paula Fusty, has once again graced her
Bloke Rocking NRL Jersey Over Hoodie Acting a Little Bulletproof
KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACT A shit stirrer by trade, Jackson Wishart has spent his young life searching for
Lord Of The Rings Dad And Harry Potter Mum Fight Over What Fantasy Franchise Their Kids Will Be Raised On
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A Betoota Heights couple have reached a bit of a stalemate this week, after an argument
Introvert Begins Lowering Standards As Search Continues For Clinic That Has A ‘Book Online’ Option
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A local woman has today decided that she’d much rather put herself out by booking
Local Woman Under False Impression That She Has Her Shit Together After Getting Her Nails Done
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact After finally doing something about the severely chipped nail polish she’d been sporting for two
Good Looking Person Unfortunately Also Very Nice And Accomplished
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact In some disappointing news, Betoota Heights local Jesse Huberman has been found to not only be
Restless Instagram It-Girl Somehow Getting Fomo From Olympic Village Parties
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT A local online socialite has conceded that she is experiencing FOMO from the Olympic village. Despite
Kmart Really Tempting Starving Uni Students By Placing Checkout As Far Away From Exit As Possible
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT K-mart has admitted that they place their checkout as far away from the exit as
Local Man’s Decadent Western Body Incompatible With Uniqlo
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local city worker has let curiosity get the better of him again this