"How Do You Like Those Melons?" - PM Might Just Euthanise Legacy Media With Proper Gambling Reform
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's legacy media publishers are this week looking like a victim of their own
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Womanizer Uncle’s New Dyed Salad Disproves His Previously Held Theory That Age Is Just A Number
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A family barbecue in Betoota Heights has this week been the scene of a major scientific
Local Mum At Least Gets Past Saying ‘Hello’ Before Pointing Out Daughter’s Recent Skin Problems
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact Local mum Debra Stewart has today been praised for exchanging a few pleasantries before loudly observing
“You Can’t Trust Someone You Don’t Know” Says PM Whose Name We Learnt After He Knifed Turnbull
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A man who became the Prime Minister of Australia after knifing his previous leader behind close
Channel 7 Reveal Sonia Kruger Will Stay On After Big Brother To Moderate Next Leader’s Debate
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some exciting news for fans of reality TV and politics, the nation is set to
Chipper Bloke Lets Sharehouse Know He’s Onto 3rd Date By Hogging Bathroom With Grooming Session
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local bloke has politely let his sharehouse know his love life is on
Alan Joyce Begrudgingly Invites Cousin Barnaby Over For Dinner But Asks Him Not To Break Wind In Front Of His Art Friends Again
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce is set to be on thin ice over at
PM Says Corruption Watchdog Is A Bad Idea Because Most Of His Colleagues Can’t Fight For Shit
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing has again today rubbished the Australian public’s demands for a
Local Woman Maintains Seltzers Are Much Healthier Even If You Smash Seven Of Them In One Hour
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A local woman has this week declared that her penchant for smashing several hard seltzers at
Boomer Says Toughen Up Because He Once Paid 17% Interest On A Home That Cost Less Than A Rav4
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In news that could see up to 300,000 Australians default on their mortgages, The Reserve
Local Woman Has A Shocker And Orders The Irish Meatlovers
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Last night at popular French Quarter trattoria, Mange Un Chat-Mort, a local woman
Tasmania Continues To Lead The Way By Enjoying Yet Another Year Of Being Carbon Negative
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As the nation continues to grapple with its carbon emissions, the little island just off Australia’
OPINION: Should Posties Be Given Protections Against Dangerous Dogs? We Say A Glock 20 Would Be Perfect
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Popular with Alaskans looking to protect themselves from bears, the Glock 20 offers formidable