Report: You Can Get Into The Surf Club Wearing Aquatic Toe Shoes But Not These Tasteful Chanel Sandals
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A woman walked into the Lake Betoota Surf Life Saving Club last Friday evening wearing what
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Liberals Criticise Government For Not Including Even A Few Billion For Pointless Carparks In Budget
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The nation’s Shadow Treasurer has today let the country know that he is NOT a
Sky News Hosts Just Absolutely Fed Up With All Of These Woke Snowflakes Condemning Genocide
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact A local Sky News hack has today revealed to The Advocate that he’s had just
Jamaica Rugby League World Cup Team Yet To Inspire Classic Film Despite All Being Ex-Sprinters
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Unlike other unlikely Jamaican teams of world sporting events past, the Jamaican Rugby League World Cup
Treasurer To Spend Entire Budget Speech Explaining How His Party Weren’t In Power For Last Decade
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The nation’s treasurer has today offered The Betoota Advocate some exclusive insight into what he
Former Pinger Rat Now At Stage Where He Has To Explain To Kids Why They’re Named Kygo And Tiësto
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A former party boy has been forced to have an honest chat this morning,
Nan Reveals She’s Totally Prepared For Cost Of Living Crisis After Decades Of Black And Gold
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT In an era where inflation has somehow become a competitive sport, some Australians are well prepared
Fleet Of Japanese Ships Undertake Urgent Research Trip To Tasmania
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT An armada of Japanese ships has reportedly been spotted making a beeline for the Tasmanian coast
Weirdly Honest Politician Admits ‘Labour Shortage’ Is Just Slang For ‘Cheaper Migrant Labour Shortage’
RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact There is a dire shortage of labour and skills in Australia, the government and big business
“Oi! Can You Not Eat Food In My [1997 Subaru Impreza], Dickhead”
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local 17-year-old car owner has today made it clear that as the owner of a
Review Of Hawthorn Finds The AFL Club Was Run By A Bunch Of Racist Melbourne Cunts
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The AFL has once again reminded the nation how fucked in the head their culture and
Local Geography Teacher Thrilled To Learn Trusty New Balance Wheels Now A Boost To His Street Cred
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local geography teacher is strutting home from school with a skip in his
Albo: “Not A Big Deal Or Anything, But A Few Springies Wouldn’t Have Gone Astray”
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact Australian Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has today given an update from the other side of the