ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
The Democratic People’s Republic of Western Australia (DPRWA) is set to hold its regularly scheduled electoral theatre tomorrow, with the Liberal Party hoping to secure more than three seats, if they can convince voters they still exist.
Despite the presence of UN election observers, few expect the outcome to differ from previous polls, with the DPRWA’s ruling Labor Party widely tipped to claim another 95% supermajority in what experts have called “a historic reaffirmation of the state’s one-party system.”
The Liberals, still reeling from their catastrophic 2021 performance where they won just two seats, are setting their sights on a big win.
“If we get three, that’s a 50% increase. If we get four, that’s a revolution,” said opposition leader Libby Mettam.
This election will be the first since the passing of Dear Leader Mark McMaoan in 2023, whose firm grip on the state ensured an unprecedented era of electoral dominance and border closures so tight they were visible from space.
His successor, Premier Roger Cook, is expected to lead Labor to another landslide, though some analysts believe his comparatively “soft” leadership, allowing non-Labor supporters to exist, could open the door for minor opposition gains.
While the UN has dispatched election monitors to ensure a fair vote, their presence has been described as mostly symbolic, with the DPRWA Electoral Commission already declaring Labor the likely winner, citing “early polling trends” and “tradition.”
Meanwhile, Liberal Party HQ has confirmed that should they win fewer than three seats, surviving members will likely enter witness protection, or just move to the Republic of South Australia.
More to come.
