UK Government To Fix Everything By Replacing PM With Bloke Who Looks Like He Sells Apartments On The Goldy

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

British Prime Minister Keir Starmer is set to be replaced by a bloke called Wes in coming days, if the growing speculation is correct. Wes looks like he sells flats on the Goldy.

Nevertheless, UK politics is in a period of serious turbulence right now. Local elections were held earlier this month and the results have been damaging for the two traditional parties, Labour with a 'U', and their effeminate Southern cousins in the Torries. Reform UK, a sort of nationalist One Nation-style outfit, surged to take 1,453 council seats, while Starmer's Labour lost 1,496 seats and the Greens made big gains too but who cares about them.

Keir Starmer called the results "tough" and somehow didn't laugh after saying that but refused to resign. The pressure has since intensified, as said above, Health Secretary Wes Streeting resigned from Cabinet a few days ago saying he had "lost confidence" in Starmer's leadership and Andy Burnham or Wes himself is now being positioned as a potential Labour leadership challenger. On the common sense, free thinking side of politics, Nigel Farage declared Reform's results a "historic shift in British politics," though Reform's vote share actually slipped slightly from its previous high. But we don't let that stop us from trying to sell newspapers. The broader takeaway from commentators is that the fracturing of British politics. away from a two-party system and toward a more fragmented multi-party landscape. looks like a lasting structural shift rather than a temporary protest vote. And it'll fucken happen here thanks to the Coalition shitting the bed everynight.

Speaking to The Advocate this morning, very kindly in the middle of his night, former UK Health Secretary Wes Streeting said he takes the imputation that he sells 'tarted up' apartments in South East Queensland.

"I think that's rather unkind," he said.

"You know, it's not really about me importing single-use Tarocash three-piece suits, nor is it about me being a slave for their reasonably price gusset boots and woven leather sandals. Or that this tie is so inflammable, that I need to take it off when I'm cooking less I run the risk of having a flaming collar around my neck,"

"I only agreed to speak to you after listening to you podcast with Alistair Campbell and I should've known better."

More to come.