"How Do You Like Those Melons?" - PM Might Just Euthanise Legacy Media With Proper Gambling Reform
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Australia's legacy media publishers are this week looking like a victim of their own
The Nation
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Podcast Bro No Longer Needs Ice Baths Or Saunas After Old Flirt At The Pub Tells Him He’s Handsome
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A 20-something middle class white man has today been saved from spiralling further into the
Ley Admits Female Quotas Are Contentious As She Needs To Placate Liberal Faction That Feels Women Should Shut Up, Cook Dinner, And Raise Children
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Opposition leader Sussan Ley has used a media appearance this morning to admit that
Landlords Prepare For Week Of Heavy Storms By Blocking All Incoming Calls
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT Landlords and rental agents across the east coast have rushed to block their tenants from all
‘Once In 100 Year’ Weather Events Reclassified As ‘Biannual Weather Patterns’
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The poor old North Coast of NSW is today battening down hatches and filling up sandbags
Sydney Braces For Their Quadrennial Schadenfreude Storm
ERROL PAKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Residents across Greater Sydney have begun preparing themselves for what meteorologists and tabloid journalists
Local Office Worker Receives Daily Steam Notification From Mate Who Works From Home
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT A steam notification on her work laptop has confirmed a bloke’s long held suspicion, that
KNEECAP Agrees To Truce With English Imperialists For Duration Of British And Irish Lions Rugby Tour
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Despite being hauled before the UK courts on terrorism charges, the firebrand Irish rap trio KNEECAP
Woman With Winter Blues Informed There’s A Psychiatrist Appointment Available In Three Months Time
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT A woman struggling with a case of seasonal affective disorder – distastefully known as ‘SAD’ – has unfortunately
SBS Politely Check In With Optus About Whether They Could Maybe Have Some EPL Rights Pls
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s premiere commercial public broadcaster has today thrown it’s hat in the ring
Glastonbury Causes Traditional Media To Wonder If They Might Be Slightly Detached From Young People
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After years of massaging headlines to avoid offending the political class, it seems that the world’
Luxury Bathhouse Now Smells Of Deep Heat And Hard Solo After 3rd Grade Footballer Dragged Their By The Missus
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A new luxury bathhouse in the Betoota industrial estate has been forced to close
Netball Canteen Has All The Treats To Soothe Local Mum’s Rosè Hangover
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local netball club canteen is expected to receive a 5 star Google review