Report: You Can Get Into The Surf Club Wearing Aquatic Toe Shoes But Not These Tasteful Chanel Sandals
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A woman walked into the Lake Betoota Surf Life Saving Club last Friday evening wearing what
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Property Investors Generously Rent To International Students While House Goes Through Renovations
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A group of property investors have defended their decision to rent out a home going through
TAB Loses $1.4bn Somehow
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Australia’s leading wagering company, TAB, has somehow announced a loss of $1.4 billion for
Local Tattoo Artist Forced To Whip Out The Orbital Sander After Client’s Card Declines
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact Clients at a popular Betoota ponds tattoo parlour were given the shock of their life yesterday,
Former Wall of Death Organiser Can’t Wait To Let That Freak Off The Leash Again
KEITH T. DENNETT | REAL LIFE | CONTACT The suburban streets of Betoota are being treated to a symphony of nu-metal classics
“I Only Vape When I’m Drinking” Says Woman Who Finds Self Pouring A Wine Every Arvo So She Can Vape
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact In an astounding display of mental gymnastics, Betoota Heights woman Anita Gunn, 25 has denied all
“See You Next Year, Friend” Man Says To Guinness Tap As Winter Finally Ends
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact With the first scorching days of spring here, French Quarter pub enjoyer Mark Thompson bid farewell
Boomer Who Never Worked Longer Than 9-5 For 40 Years Says Right To Disconnect Is Typical Of Lazy Youth
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact An elderly Betoota Heights gentleman has taken to Facebook today to share his thoughts on the
Local Bloke Wishes Cat Could Ask For Attention Without Shoving His Leather Cheerio In His Face
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A local bloke has yet again found himself begging his cat to please, please stop shoving
“So… Net This Weekend?” Asks Fourth Grade Cricket Captain Seeing Fellow Pubgoers In Shorts This Afternoon
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact As the weather begins to warm up and blokes start showing up at the pub in
Dad Too Stubborn To Call A Plumber To Make Problem Ten Times Worse With Botched DIY Attempt
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Editor | CONTACT In an astounding showcase of stubbornness, local Betoota Heights dad Gary Palmer managed to turn a
Mate Who Nipped Finger Off Using A Mandoline Still Convinced It’s More Convenient Than A Knife
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Editor | CONTACT In an unsurprising twist for anyone who knows him, local Betoota Heights resident Kyle Watson remains
Local Woman Asks Boyfriend If His Pixelated Soccer Players Are Making Him Sad Again
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A woman coming home to a very sullen boyfriend has come to the conclusion that his