Social Media Giants Shocked They're Clashing With Country That Banned Guns And Nights Out

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The social media giants are surprisingly shocked that a country quick to ban guns and nights out is also being such narks about keeping under 16s off their platforms.

The under 16s ban, a world first in social media regulation, has come as something of a shock to the social media titans, who were completely unaware of Australia's proud nanny state status.

"Well yeah they ended the gun debate in a few weeks over a mass shooting and shut down an entire city's nightlife for a decade after a murder, but we didn't think they'd go so hard on us!" said one spokesperson for Meta.

Regulators say the move is designed to protect developing brains from endless scrolling, targeted ads and whatever TikTok trend currently involves inhaling something dangerous for views. 

Officials argued that if Australia could stop people from dancing after 1:30am, stopping kids from doomscrolling before puberty should be a breeze.

Tech executives, however, remain stunned by the speed and decisiveness of the legislation, noting that they are far more accustomed to countries taking years to move on stuff like this.

"We expected a few consultations, maybe a sternly worded email" said a flustered representative from X.

"Not an outright ban before we’d even finished drafting our excuses"

At time of writing, the tech industry is preparing a united response.