Local Moron Thinks He's Making It Through To Socceroos Game

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT

A local man whose brain has given him precious little since it fully developed nearly a decade ago, is short circuiting again today.

Bailey Milsom (33) from our town's Betoota Heights District has drawn a sigh from his wife, after revealing to his better half how he plans to spend the night.

With a historic World Cup knock out clash awaiting Milsom and the rest of the nation sick enough to get up at 3:30 am - the great man says he's actually gonna push through.

"Yeah fuck it, why not!" said an excitable Milsom, ordering his first crisp pint of the evening.

"What's the point of going to bed to wake up a couple of hours later."

"I'll probably be more groggy if I do that."

"So I reckion just make a night of it."

"Once every four years and that," said Milsom, who is hungover for four years after he gives it a nudge these days.

Speaking to the Advocate his wife Jess said you can't teach an old dog new tricks.

"He's an idiot."

"He won't even watch the game."

"I bet you he'll pickle himself and fall asleep on one of the boys couches at 2:41 am."

"He can't drink like he used to."

"And then he'll drag himself through the door at 10am tomorrow feeling sorry himself and asking if I want breakfast Maccas."

"Ah well, good on him."

"I'll enjoy waking up, watching us with clear eyes and then having a nice little sleep afterwards."

More to come.