"Fuck The Piss Here Is Cheap" Sydneysider Says Of Felons

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A Sydney man visiting the Smart State this week for business has been pleasantly surprised by how cheap the piss is at one of Brisbane's finest watering holes.

On the Howard Smith Wharves this afternoon, Sydney-based construction project manager Darcy Strickland was warned by his hosts that they were heading to a place where "he'd have to get a second mortgage out to cover the bill".

Speaking to The Advocate around 2pm, with about 5 pints under his fake Hermes belt, Strickland said he was confused at first and though his "toothless hick" hosts were having a sook over the happy hour price of $15 a pint.

"The first thing that made me chuckle was them telling me I needed a second mortgage. Ah, mate, I've got a mortgage in Balmain. I could buy half this sorry swamp for what I paid for my free-standy there. That's right, I actually listened in school so I don't have to have any common walls. I've got a front and back yard, too," said the humble city worker.

"Then, I heard them sooking over a pint of their house dog's piss being $15! Fuck me, fire up, you sad cunts. You'd pay more than that at the fucken Sackville. And that place is full of no hopers, let me tell you that,"

"But fancy that, being told this is the pinnacle of excess in Brisbane. $15 for a pint. Fuck this piss here is cheap. I might even move here. Kidding of course."

More to come.