Word Of The Week: Apricity (The Beautiful Warmth Of The Winter Sun)
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT With Naplan scores dropping and literacy seemingly slipping away in an age of autocorrect, The Betoota
Latest news (Page 973)
Dreadlocked White Boy Playing Bongo Drums Outside Melbourne CFMEU Office Insists He’s A Tradie
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A dreadlocked Xavier Rudd-looking hippy currently banging out reggae ballads outside the CFMEU head office
Bored Woman Planning To Make Some Croissants Visibly Shaken By The Cost Of Butter Sheets
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact After being told to stay inside and away from a foreign super flu for
Plane Taking Scotty To Washington DC For Photo Ops Makes Emergency Landing In Hawaii
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s fleeing Prime Minister has reportedly just had a big scare. Heading across the
Exhausted ICU Nurse Immediately Joins The CFMEU After Seeing Them Punch On With Anti-Vaxxers
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT LIFELONG LOYALTY: Victoria has today recorded another 567 new community cases in greater Melbourne, bumping the
“Fuck Me Dead, There’s Lots Of French In Canberra,” Says Barnaby Copping Another Drive-By Spray
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Acting Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has been copping more drive-by abuse than normal,
Roosters Fan Relieved To Be Able To Finally Live His Truth And Proudly Support The Wallabies
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A Sydney man has this week had a huge weight lifted off his shoulders. The Paddington
Crumbed Steak On Pub Menu Identified As Key Difference Between ‘The Bush’ And ‘The Outback’
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The National Farmers Federation has this week released the findings of a recent report into where
Acting PM Barnaby Chooses To Just Keep Hanging Up On The Irate French Man Who Keeps Calling The Office
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Acting Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has told The Advocate that he’s been
Report: What The Fuck Is Going On Here?
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In a story that continues to get dodgier by the week, Christian Porter has resigned from
Type-1 Diabetic Urges People Not To Lump His Superior Kind In With The Unwashed Type-2s
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A popular local tradesman with a largely inconvenient auto-immune condition has made it
Hospo Worker Carefully Puts Feelers Out To See If New Employee Hates That Bitch Too
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT A disgruntled hospo worker has today decided to test the waters with a new employee, for
Single Girls In Friendship Circle Complain About Their IBS And Gluten Intolerance Instead Of A Man
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT A group of girls has decided to switch things up today, choosing to talk about their