Hot Water Bottle And Cuppa Found To Be The Girlfriend Version Of 5 Guinness Pints

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

As the fresher months roll around, wives and girlfriends across Australia are currently relishing in their favourite womanly winter treats.

Namely, porridge and low caffeine tea.

The heartier stews and soups are also on the menu, as simmering pots of minestrone and chicken stock simmer on the stove top.

However, nothing says the woman of the house is feeling cold like the clicks of a permanently boiling kettle, which is then decanted into the mouth of a rubber hot water bottle.

The warmth and snugness that this squishy vessel provides is unmatched. Not even electric blankets or ceramic fan heaters can generate the same level of cosiness as a hottie under a doonah on the couch.

The only other winter past time that could maybe compete with this wholesome household ritual is the act of drinking at least five pints of jet black Irish stout in a poorly sealed local pub.

Although much more common with men, consuming five 570 milliliter glass of Guinness can also evoke the same feelings of safety and relaxation that Australian women find in a hot water bottle and cuppa.

While the seat is usually far less comfortable than a couch, and the surrounding atmosphere is far less intellectually stimulating than a light-hearted TV series, the fact remains that men seek and find the same exact same emotional cocoon in the 8-10 standard drinks that can be found in five pints of Guinness - which can usually be consumed in the space of 1-2 hours, depending on the pace of fellow drinker and the window that has been identified.

It's basically the same thing, except with 5 pints of Guinness you don't need to have dinner!