Grandpa Nods Politely Through Explanation Of Career He Will Never Understand

JONTY SPEEDMAN | Culture | CONTACT

A local grandfather has politely nodded his way through a description of a career he has absolutely no hope of ever fully comprehending.

John McArthur found himself completely out of his depth this afternoon at his nephew’s birthday party, after he asked his granddaughter’s new boyfriend what he does for a living.

The retired steelworker was expecting to hear “sparky” or “plumber”, but was instead met with a detailed explanation of Tom Smith’s role as an Administrative Logistics Technician, a profession involving “streamlining inventory processes” and “updating databases” and, somewhat concerningly for McArthur, zero mention whatsoever of steel, concrete or physical labour.

During this time, witnesses confirm that Pop offered smiles and polite nodding, all while mentally filing terms such as “stakeholder engagement” alongside cryptocurrency, LinkedIn and the cloud.

“Basically, I optimise workflows and facilitate communication between stakeholders to help us meet our KPIs,” the 27-year-old summarised.

Following a series of rightio’s and gotcha’s from the 84-year-old, he eventually popped the question he’d really been thinking about the entire conversation.

“So what is it you really do mate?”

“Because all this mumbo jumbo talk isn’t telling me much ha ha.”

After a second attempt from Smith to explain his occupation in terms McArthur might understand, the retiree ultimately settled on the conclusion that he “works with computers” before deciding it was time for cake.