Reporters for working for Australia’s biggest media monoply have today been treated to an afternoon at Wet ‘n’ Wild, as their bosses fight tooth and nail to avoid publishing any news about a particular news story that seems to go against their owners ideology.

That particular news story being the fact that millions of people, led by Swedish youth activist Greta Thunberg and students from Sydney to Delhi and Melbourne to London and New York, are today marching for urgent action on climate change, which appears to be something that the kids are fairly concerned about considering they’ll be the ones who have to live through the envrionmental catastrophes currently being caused by our sycophantic silver-haired elected officials and the other heavyweights of the western political classes, like mining lobbyists and the Murdoch family.

For the first time in NewsLimited history, every single employee on the Murdoch payroll has been gifted a staff day trip.

This is an unfathomable job perk for Sky News and all News Corp reporters, who are spend most of their careers terrified of being sacked for getting pregnant or unionising.

With hundred of thousands of students protestors today rallying in every major centre around Australia, the jackboot journalists for Murdoch are today enjoying a day at Wet ‘n’ Wild!

“This is awesome!” said Kyle Chaddington (22), Daily Telegraph environmental reporter, who recently got promoted from

“Mammoth Falls is crazy haha!”

Another journalist, Sky News field reporter, Kelly Cheryl (44) says it’s good to feel like you are valued, after spending 6 months relentlessly campaigning for a Morrison government.

“I can’t believe they flew every reporter from every newsroom in the country to the Gold Coast in blindfolds!”

“This is awesome!”


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