"Babe You Reckon That Chicken Was Off Last Night" Wonders Tradie Who Just Pumped A Lukewarm 600ML MilkyBar Oak

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Local Betoota Heights-based fridgie, Dale Bunsterdun (40) says he's is deeply concerned that he might be experiencing the early stages of of a salmonella infection.

This comes after experiencing what kind only be described as a crook gut.

Despite not having really passed solid stool since he was a teenager, Dale says he noticed a little more movement than usual during today's post-smoko session in the blue sauna.

This has led him to believe that he may now be suffering from a bacterial disease affecting his intestinal tract.

While tracing his steps back from his cheesy bacon and curried steak meat pie, nothing about his diet seemed out of the ordinary.

He started the day at 5:30am with his usual takeaway extra hot mugochino with two splends and a healthy honk of his blueberry-flavoured nicotine vape.

This was followed by a full-strength coca-cola buddy at 830am.

At 11am he noticed the pie van was offering a deal on a Killer Python and flavoured milk combo. Dale figured he'd had enough caffeine by this stage so opted against his usual iced coffee and instead went for the new 600ml Milkybar chocolate Oak -which was basically just like normal milk in that it was coloured white.

From there, it was pretty much business as usual. A fried kransky and a pie, followed by a half-frozen golden circle pineapple poppa.

It simply doesn't make sense for him to be blasting the portaloo with such an explosive case of the trots.

In fact, there's only one way to figure out if he indeed is about to break out into a fever of nausea and non-stop vomiting as, and that is to call his wife and ask if she thinks that last night's dinner may have been contaminated.

His wife, Pia, has not experienced the same symptons, and honestly cannot imagine that last night's protein could've been undercooked or undercooked.

"It was chicken tandoori, Dale" says Pia.

"It was grilled and then kept in the oven"

"Have you had any water today?"

Dale wonders, but then remembers that he had a couple mouthfuls of water from the thermos in his ute just before arriving on site. What could it be?

MORE TO COME.