Boomers With 5 Properties And $4.9M In Super Reduced To Gruel And Stale Bread In Jim's Communist Dystopia
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT After a lifetime of selflessly serving the state that gave them nothing by incredible employment, free
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Villain Looks Menacingly Into Security Camera To Assert Authority
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Fear was struck into the hearts of honest men everywhere today as notorious underworld figure Dr
Local Woman Posts Heart-Warming Tribute To Dead Childhood Pet On Exclusively Human Medium
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Jane Harris (@ImStillJaneyFromTheBlock) is in mourning today after her childhood dog, Chester, was fatally bitten by
Melbourne Quietly Volunteers To Take The UK’s Spot In The EU Post Brexit Finalisation
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The city of Melbourne has sensationally asked to become a member of the European Union this
Recent Divorcee’s Own Divorce Jokes Are Starting To Get A Bit Awkward Now
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact “Who wants these Book of Mormon tickets? I bought them for Ben and I, but then
Nation Grins As They Prepare To Chuck New Lime Green Share-Bikes Into Closest Body Of Water
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact ‘Are we really doing this again?’ Is what every resident of Australia’s major city is
Drunk Mate Entering Mute Phase
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact Emily Smales has just offered her last piece of incoherent speech to her drunken girls chat
Powerade Update Definition Of ‘Athlete’ To Include Excess Consumption Of Alcohol
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact A new ad from Powerade, the non-fizzy soft drink company trying to pass as a sports
WA Tourist Treated For Temporary Blindness After Being Overcome By Brightness Of Perth Airport
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT An interstate tourist has been hospitalised in Perth this afternoon after an incident of temporary blinding.
Local Woman Asserts Status In Group By Asking To Sample House Rosé
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Ally Williams has impressed her friends this afternoon by pulling off a play at the bar.
Local Council’s Spending Justified After Backpackers Finally Use Public Gym Equipment
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact The Diamantina Shire Council is relieved today after seeing two people finally use the weird toy-like
Bottles Of Vitamins In Uber Cup Holders Hints At Imminent Pyramid Scheme Pitch
TRACEY BENDINGER | Culture | Contact “Do you have any gum?” Kayla Wakefield asked her Uber driver. “No, I don’t have
“Haha, Nah” Say Government MPs In Response To Calls For A Federal Corruption Watchdog
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Colaition has today explained to The Advocate why a Federal Independent Commission Against Corruption, or