Woman Officially Feeling Old After Every Actress She Googles Is Now Younger Than Her
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT Ashling Murphy (31) is experiencing a second wave of aging terror after coming to find every
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Tesla Engineers Baffled As Local Boomer Manages To Install 44 Viruses Into Car’s Computer
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local baby boomer, who thought purchasing an overpriced luxury electric vehicle will absolve him of
QUIZ: On A Scale Of 1 To Peter Dutton – How Much Of A Dumb Cunt Are You?
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT With last night’s Four Corners exposè providing even greater insight into the limited brain function
Shorten To Remain Undecided On Adani Until He’s In Central QLD And There’s No Cameras Around
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact Opposition Leader Bill Bradbury Shorten has today confirmed that when it comes to Adani, he will
FM Radio Saddened 2019 MAFS Crop Failed To Yield A Single Brain Capable Of Radio Career
INGRID DOULTON | Radio | Contact Executives from a number of local frequency modulation radio stations have expressed their sorrow over the
Paleos Take A Turn At Shutting Down Melbourne
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Melbourne’s paleo community have taken to the streets today to demand the rest of the
Fox Sports Hire 1000 New Journos To Cover Every Single Detail Of Valentine Holmes’ NFL Journey
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact Online sports organisation Fox Sorts has today demonstrated how good they are at keeping a finger
WrestleMania 2019 Overshadowed By Heavily Manufactured Plot Twists In MAFS Finale
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact The world’s biggest event in the wrestling calendar has today been overshadowed by a humble
Melbourne Vegan Protests End Abruptly After White People Get Distracted By New Crime Podcast
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The hysteria down in Melbourne has come to an abrupt end this afternoon, after the city’
Nation Somehow Shocked By Campbelltown Boy With Neck Tattoos And Mohawk Using The Rude Finger
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Dusty Martin’s top tier sledging of rival footballers has come under scrutiny this week, as
Vegan Protestor On Remand Forced To Watch MAFS Finale As Punishment
INGRID DOULTON | Television and Other Drugs | Contact A number of vegan protestors arrested today in Melbourne will be forced to
Construction Site Morale Boosted By Heroic Local Foreman Performing Menial Task
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A foreman has led by example this afternoon at a Betoota Heights construction site this afternoon
NBN Contractor Prepares For Natural Progression Into NDIS Contractor
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After spending the last couple years leaning on a shovel, local Betoota Heights man Keiran Smithers