Australia Urgently Sends Tubby Taylor To France On Diplomatic Posting As Europe Endures Brutal Heatwave

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After three consecutive days of a record-breaking heatwave in France, Australia has moved quickly to support our close trading partners and allies in central Europe.

According to the country's public health agency, France has recorded 1,000 more daily deaths as they combat a weather event not often seen outside of equatorial and tropical nation's like Australia.

While Australians scoff at the notion of 150 million Europeans struggling in the "extreme heat" - it's worth remembering that none of these countries have the kind of infrastructure to survive 40 degree days in their windless metropolis cities.

Without any appropriate architecture or air-conditioning, scientists say this past week of record-breaking temperatures has been the worst the continent has ever recorded.

Back in Australia, a country all too familiar with this kind of cruel summer sun, the Federal Government has outlined immediate plans to help our friends in Europe in the same way they sent emergency supplies down under during the Black Summer bushfires.

Prime Minister Albanese has today confirmed that his first point of order will be to send former Australian cricket legend Mark 'Tubby' Taylor to Paris on a diplomatic posting.

"We must act fast" said the Prime Minister.

"The brasseries and bistros are like ovens right now."

The PM explained that Mark Taylor's secondment to the City Of Love was crucial to minimising the effects of the climate-change-aided heat wave.

"In the same way he educates Australians every test cricket series, continental Europe have a lot to learn about air-conditioning. They aren't familiar with the sensation of having the AC on so low that you need to sit underneath a doonah while watching the first ball of the summer"

However, Australia's heatwave support package won't be limited to air-conditioning, says the PM.

"Once Tubby is set up and educating the Europeans on what it means to live in Fujitsu Comfort, we will be sending representatives from Australian Lifesavers to conduct bronze medallion courses along the banks of the The Seine and in the canal suburbs of Paris"

"This kind of heat needs to be managed. No horseplay or cannon balls"