ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Some cunt’s son from our town’s leafiest enclave has said he’s fine with having an accountant with zero qualifications in environmental science decide the nation’s climate future.

Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce has the other Deputy Prime Minister Scott Morrison by the balls and he won’t let go until the latter agrees to pretty much do what Prime Minister Gina Rinehart wants him to do.

Mr Joyce went to a nice boarding school near a large body of salt water, attended a regional university where he complete a Bachelors of Perpetual Inebriation (Hons) and became an accountant in St George.

He then became a senator, where he crossed the floor many times on issues that gave the bush the raw prawn.

Regardless of that, Lachlan MacDonald (who is the grandson of Protestant healthcare magnate John MacDonald) said he’s happy and OK with Barnaby calling the shots on our future.

“Why have a scientist when you can have Barnaby?” he asked our reporter.

“He sticks up for the bush where scientists just want obese Catholics in the Murray-Darling Basin to stop sucking water out of the rivers and wetlands to grow cash crops. They want to stop coal mining because they don’t have a vested family interest in it like Matt Canavan,”

“Why do scientists hate making folding ones? Barnaby is a champion of the bush and it’s the people in Canberra that don’t understand it. Net zero is bad for townies, blockies and cockies. It’s a trickle down. If the farmers don’t make money then the serfs who live in town don’t either,”

“I mean battlers. Not serfs. Anyway, the system [of governance] works and I have full faith in it.”

More to come.

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