Year 12 Formal Suit Pushed To Its Absolute Limit As Local Prop Scrubs Up For Rugby Club Presos

KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT

Buttons are working overtime on a skinny fit suit this evening, as a reserve grade rugby specialist toasts to another successful season.

Waddling into the Betoota Race Club tonight, 26 year old Betoota Mutts prop Phil ‘Filthy’ Tookey is suited, booted and coated in Invictus cologne, excited to rip into local rugby's night of nights.

Having held down the scrum for 10 out of 12 games this season for the 4th grade Mutts squad, and making some serious impact off the bench in the 3rd grade Grand Final, Phil tells The Advocate he fancies his chances at picking up a club medal.

“I seriously reckon I could be in danger of getting a Players Player in the 4th grade awards, I was the most capped player all season,” Phil told our reporter, as he pulled a huge wedgie from his backside.

“Not to mention I anchored all the boat race wins too.”

Given tonight is essentially the Oscars for local ruck n’ maul enthusiasts, Phil has decided to dust off his old pinstripe Tarocash suit, the same one he wore to his year 12 formal back in 2018.

Paired with a pair of chestnut RM Williams which he wears to his desk job every day, and a black kangaroo leather belt, it can be confirmed that Phil is looking pretty dashing.

“It’s a bit of a squeeze but it does the job,” says Phil, as he pulled a loose thread that was hanging from his back pockets.

“Still fits me well, even though I was a skinny winger back in high school. I’ve put on some good mass since then.”

More to come.