Woman Officially Feeling Old After Every Actress She Googles Is Now Younger Than Her

SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT

Ashling Murphy (31) is experiencing a second wave of aging terror after coming to find every actress she googles these days is younger than her. 

The first wave was, of course, her 30th birthday. However, she did truly think she’d put this whole “God, I’m so old and my life is over” thing behind her. 

“I can talk about it quite openly now, but yeah. I was really blue on my 30th. I was thinking about how I was 26 and thought I was so old. And how now I actually was. But I really felt like I flipped the script after that though,”

“All it took was a rewatch of Sex and The City to remind me my thirties can actually be funnnnn and flirty and like the start of my life all over again,”

“But now, it’s like I’ve taken a turn for the worse all of a sudden,”

Ashling says there was once a time she loved googling all the random actors while watching a movie for no apparent reason. Now, however, the act has become depressing.  

“Me and my sister watched The Housemaid the other night. I google Sydney Sweeney. Boom what the fuck she’s 28,”

“Marty Supreme gets added to Stan so me and my boyfriend watch it. I’m all like ‘hmm I wonder how old this main girl is’, get fucked, she’s 25,”

“Actually, the worst one was that new Colleen Hoover movie, the one with the chick from Girls. The younger one in that, OK yes she looks young, but I was expecting like 22 or 23. Nup 19. Legit born in 2007 or something,” she said, shuddering.

Though Ashling acknowledges she's just fine with her career in HR, seeing actresses 10 years your junior earning more than you’ll make in your life with one movie stings just a bit. 

More to come.