Wimbledon Organisers Delighted That All The Loud Brits Are At The World Cup Or At The Pub

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Wimbledon organisers have breathed a sigh of relief, with the World Cup acting as the figurative steak thrown to distract the dog from their more refined event.

"It's just a really, really, fortunate scheduling clash," said one Wimbledon organiser.

With many of "those" brits either at the World Cup or watching the World Cup at the pub, Wimbledon's upper class fans can finally enjoy some real sport in peace.

"It's been lovely," said one woman in a linen blazer.

"Usually you still get the odd bloke wandering in here after six pints, asking why the scoreboard looks like a maths equation and yelling 'come on son' at whoever looks vaguely British."

Tournament staff say the reduced presence of football supporters has allowed spectators to once again focus on Wimbledon's most cherished traditions, such as politely clapping, not getting too excited, and paying 14 pounds for strawberries.

One steward said the difference was noticeable almost immediately.

"Normally by lunchtime we've had to turn around dozens of commoners," he said.

"This year they're all safely contained at pubs, airports and fan zones, where they belong."

Organisers are now hoping England progresses deep into the World Cup, preferably until the exact moment Wimbledon ends.

"Obviously we wish the national team all the best," said one official.

"Mainly because every extra game keeps another 80,000 scum as far away as possible from here."