Sharkies Fan Treats Himself To Rare Luxury Of Visiting A Toilet That Works At Halftime

KEITH T. DENNET | South | Contact

“Wow, this is the life,” ponders Justin Caringbah tonight as he empties himself inside a toilet cubicle at Allianz Stadium.

After an intense first half between the Sydney Roosters and Cronulla Sharks, The Advocate understands the chippy from Kirrawee in Sydney's South, has decided to see what all the fuss is about, and treat himself to the rare luxury of using a toilet that’s fixed to a wall, whilst at the footy.

After years of only ever attending Sharkies games if they were a short drive from his house, it’s understood last weekend's miserable display of Sharks fans at the Cowboys match inspired Justin to actually get in his Nissan Navara and drive the 45 minutes up to Moore Park to watch his side play finals footy.

Impressed with all the amenities that come with the recently refurbished $828 million stadium, Justin says he’s pretty blown away with all the mod cons and fancy tech inside Allianz.

“Wow, it’s got flush buttons and everything!” Justin whispered, as he unbuckled his belt and dropped his backside onto the porcelain throne.

“I wonder if they have those hand dryers like in the airports, the dyson ones that blow air really, really fast.”

Asking the Sharkies diehard what he thought of his experience overall, Justin tells The Advocate he does miss some of the creature comforts of his dearly beloved Shark Park.

“The food’s a bit too fancy tho, I can’t find a Zambrero food truck, and all the stalls here are serving salt n’ pepper octopus.”

“And they certainly don’t miss ya! $28 for a burger?? I’m saving my money for a Big Mac at Engadine Maccas on the way home.”

More to come.