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A Betoota Grove local has ignited Ozempic rumours with an admission regarding his favorite type of chips.
Sammy Phillips (28) had been perusing the chips aisle at Betoota IGA with his housemates when he casually picked up the red bag of ‘French Fries’.
“Fuck I love these aye, so good,” said Sammy. “Let’s get them,” he added, tossing them into the basket his housemate Drew was holding.
The other boys stared at him.
“Bro what. Genuinely what. Those bags are genuinely 95% air, there’s no way you’re actually satisfied after a bag of those. And it’s only gotten worse with shrinkflation too, like they used to go alright in the lunchbox as a kid but now we’re fully grown adults, you’d get two bites out of that tops. The chips are basically air themselves even,” said Drew.
“Yeah man that’s not on. Red rock delis are half price right now,” said Sammy’s other housemate Dean.
Speaking with our reporter privately, Sammy’s housemates expressed concern over his young man's wellbeing.
“He’s hundredddd percent on the ozempic. Actually can’t believe I didn’t realise til now tbh. He’s been having rice cakes for breakfast, that’s not right,” said Dean.
“Yeah we’re reconsidering extending the lease, he says he hates the Sweet Chili red rock delis, like that’s a real red flag,” said Drew.
Sammy has firmly denied the allegations, stating he just “eats like a bird” and always has.
“Those other boys just have hollow legs,” he said.
More to come.