Local Woman Still Plagued By Willy Wonka Tunnel Scene 20 Years Later

SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT

A young woman in Betoota’s French Quarter has suffered through a rather restless night after the Willy Wonka tunnel scene emerged from the depths of her memory, right in time for bed. 

Up until about 9pm, Ziggy Wilson (27) had enjoyed a restful Thursday evening, guided by some skincare, a podcast, and therapeutic meal prep. 

She’d even set aside an extra half hour to get in some reading before bed; to properly unwind without blue light polluting her brain and destroying any chance of REM. 

However, as Ziggy’s head hit her pillow, a tormenting vision of the tunnel scene from Willy Wonka flashed before her eyes. 

She shot up in bed right away. 

“What the fuck was that. What. The. Fuck,” she said, in between heaving breaths. 

“Holy fuck. I’d almost forgotten about that. Dude. What on Earth.”

“Why did anyone think it was OK to show a 6 year old images of cockroaches flapping around and a chicken being decapitated in this weird dreamlike projection effect while the most menacing singing ever goes on in the background.”

“Like everyone thinks Johnny Depp was a creepy Willy but like hello, Gene Wilder in that scene is FUCKED”

“It must be because it was so terrifying everyone is experiencing some sort of collective hole in their memory for like, self preservation or something. Surely.”

“Genuinely how am I going to sleep now.”

Ziggy stood up, slid her feet into her slippers and rummaged through her drawers for a jar of melatonin tablets. 

Unfortunately, even those couldn’t fend of the visions. 

She is reportedly working from home today. 

More to come.