The Deep State Finally Silences All-Powerful Co-Star Of Two Mildly Popular 2000s Comedies
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The deep state has struck again this week, it can be confirmed. For those who have
Latest news (Page 251)
Australia Celebrates Launch Of The Leyland P76 Of Rockets
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Australia’s ambitions in space were well and truly off the ground this week,
Self Described ‘Natural Flirt’ Surprisingly Only Flirts With Attractive People
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A local woman has raised some eyebrows this week, after insisting she’s simply a ‘natural
Expiry Date On Milk Reminds Local Girl She’s Got A Long Way To Go Until Pay Day
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local girl is once again cursing the cruel, sadistic human that invented the
PM Comes Up With Simple Way To Decide Australia’s Position On Palestine: Another $400m Referendum
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Prime Minister of Australia has today moved to clarify the national position on the conflict
Group Chat Pronounced Dead For Next 48 Hours After Roommate Sends Through Message Chasing Bills
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A usually bustling share house group chat has come to a standstill this week, with reports
Treasurer Jim ‘Chee Hoo’ Chalmers Tells The Reserve Bank Uso I Don’t Wanna Hear No Chat
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Federal Treasurer has today shown his inner Logan boy, after learning some heartening news. Jim
Women’s Toilet Graffiti Discovered To Be A Lot Nicer Than Blokes
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact YOU ARE SO LOVED! It can now be reported that graffiti found in women’s toilets
The Qantas Brand Almost Fucked Enough For Government To Stop Protecting Them From High Speed Rail
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Less than a month after more than 6 million Qantas customers had their personal data hacked
Influencers Fear Social Media Age Limits Will Also Mean They Can No Longer Exploit Own Kids For Content
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact As Australia forges ahead with social media age verification laws, influencers who exploit their children for
Jeez Glad We Followed These Fair-weather Friends Into Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan And Every Other War They’ve Started Over The Last Century
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT War hawks across the country’s media and political class are today desperately trying to see
Perth’s Historic Rivalry Between Army Hunks And Failed AFL Players Spills Over Into Liberal Party
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Perth’s locally-famous football stars have long taken issue with the fact that chicks preferred
Vale Sir Michael Hill: Nation’s Saucy Hornbags Put Out Their Cubic Zirconia Rings In Remembrance Of Jewellery Titan
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Australia is paying tribute to one of our Kiwi cousins this afternoon as thousands