Inflation Rate Jumps As Stupid Poor People Pay More For Frivolous Things Like Fuel And Groceries

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The nation's brightest economic minds have once again been left scratching their heads at what to do with the unwashed masses.

With geopolitic issues driving the cost of everything through the roof, the x's and o's spreadsheet people have revealed that inflation is unsurprisingly trending up.

Inflation has jumped from 3.7% to 4.6% in the year to March.

With consumer prices now growing at their fastest pace in two and a half years, the Reserve Bank will inevitably hike interest rates for a third straight meeting next Tuesday.

The spike says treasurer, Jim Chalmers, is the flow on of an Iran war-linked fuel shock that will ripple through the economy over coming months.

However, sources close to the Reserve Bank, the major banks and the government's trusted economic sources say the cause of inflation is actual stupid poor people pissing money away on stuff like fuel, groceries and power bills.

"It's just so frustrating," explained a spokesperson for the reserve bank of Australia.

"Time and time again we tell people to stop spending money."

"And time and time again they go out there and fill up the car and trolley and let the giant companies price gouge them to a slow death."

"I know there's all these international factors that said companies are cashing in on because Australia has enjoyed decades of deregulation to the point where the government has handed over complete control to pretty much every sector in the country."

"But at the end of the day, it's the silly poor people that keep pissing their money away and driving up inflation."

"So we are left with no other option than driving up interest rates."