In news that has tickled his cheerleaders in the campaign media pack, Prime Minister Scotty From Marketing has coincidentally tackled a kid while playing soccer in rural Tasmania, on the same day the Australian Bureau of Statistics revealed that wages only grew by 0.7 per cent in the March quarter, failing dismally to keep up with a 5.1% inflation rate.

This alleged ‘accident’ happened at around 5pm yesterday afternoon, just as every TV network was preparing their lead stories for the evening news, and every newspapers was preparing their front page story.

The fact that Morrison dropped his shoulder before the collision, and was running nowhere near the ball at the time, is of no interest to the Australian media – who have been chasing but funniest home videos style highlight reels this entire election campaign.

No one else has either bothered to point out the UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson, the pioneer of daggy dad politicians, also ‘accidentally’ tackled a child in identical circumstances several years ago.

This hilarious video has already been pin-balled around TV news breaks and social media, as journalists pat themselves on the back for their ability to catch this extremely important campaign moment on camera.

This classic ScoMo gaffe has already managed to crowd out the news that Australia’s latest wages data has been labelled a “horror result” that signals a need for “government intervention” after the figures showed the worst wage decline this century.

It has also eliminated any mention of Albanese’s National Press Club speech, in which he announced plans to introduce 10 days paid domestic violence leave in every workplace in the country, in an effort to address the horrifying statistics that show 1 woman is murdered in Australia every week.

Any talk of a Federal corruption watchdog – or the fact that China now has a security base less than 1000 kilometres from Australian soil in the Solomon Islands – has also been edged out of the news cycle because classic ScoMo tackled a kid haha.


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