Club Playmaker Cops A Spray For Skipping Weekend Footy To Propose To His Girlfriend
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT One of Betoota’s most exciting young halfbacks is expected to be sanctioned this
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“Gee Are They Striking Out Here Too?” Asks Barnaby While Visiting Understaffed Tamworth Hospital
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Deputy Prime Minister of Australia has received a bit of a rude shock after turning
Australian Republic Movement Not Really Capitalising On The Whole ‘Royals Are Rock Spiders’ Thing
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Australian Republic Movement have today continued to play nice, despite having a slam dunk sitting
Channel 9 Fly Gus Gould Over To Western Ukraine To Do Special Opening Monologue For World War 3
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some exciting news from the Eastern European nation of Ukraine – Gus Gould is in the
Local Cupid Blows Girlfriend Away By Getting Packet Of Choccy Bullets Delivered At 9pm
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT A local bloke has tonight been able to successfully swerve potential blowback from Valentine’s Day,
Bright Kid Dragged To Canberra “Freedom Convoy” Begs Parents To Please Let Her Go To Questacon
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A brainy child who could very well be our Nation’s next Deborah Williamson
Local Woman Worries Return Of Dr Dre And Mary J Blige Will Trigger A Comeback Of Low Rise Jeans
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT In startling news for women nationwide, low rise jeans could be on the horizon, which also
Aussie NFL Fan Insists His Love Of American Sports Is Not Related To Rampant Gambling Addiction
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A suburban man who loves his American sports has alleged today that his interest in the
Local Graphic Designer Uses Winter Olympics As An Opportunity To Tell Everyone He’s Been To Japan
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A self-described ‘Powder Hound’ has skillfully used the broadcast of the Winter Olympics, to
Bloke Hobbling Into Pub Wearing Moon Boot In February Must Really Know How To Party
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT A local ‘Sesh Lord’ is turning heads this afternoon, hobbling into the front bar
‘Undercover Boss’ Remake Cancelled After Nation’s CEOs Refuse To Experience Frontline Work
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Fans of early ‘10s TV have a whole new reason to be depressed this week as
Did You Know: The Gold Coast Has Had A Team Playing In The AFL For 11 Years
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Fun fact of the day time! The Gold Coast has actually had a professional Australian Rules
PM Hospitalised With Exhaustion After Completing A Full Day Of Work Lobbying For The Church
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Australian Prime Minister Scott Morrison has been rushed to hospital after experiencing what has been described