Government Under Fire For Offering Bonus Bets During Census
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The Federal Government has tonight been forced to defend a controversial feature of the national census.
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Discarded Bottle Of Human Piss Plunges Sydney Trains Network Into Chaos
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Trains in the nation’s worst city have been plunged into chaos this afternoon
Study Confirms Gen X Are Just Boomers Who Like Star Wars
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A recent study conducted by Australia’s peak scentific body, the CSIRO, has concluded
What Is And What Isn’t Newsworthy Not Important To Local Newspaper Editor At This Time Of Year
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact “We can’t put out a newspaper with blank pages in it!” he yelled.
Man’s Penchant For Straddling Barstools Directly Correlates To His Red Dead Addiction
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact While to the casual onlooker, it might seem that Brett Dunaway has a bad
Subdued “Ooooo” Follows Failed Pokies Gamble
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Dropping five dollar bombs on Where’s The Gold like a Lancaster over Dresden,
MCG Curator Elects To Use Defibrillator Instead Of Light Roller This Morning
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One of the curators of the Melbourne Cricket Ground has told reporters this morning
Lifeguards Sigh As Yet Another Kook Dad Runs Directly Into Rip Tide
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact “Oh for fucks sake!” he sighed. “I’ve only just got dry. Hey! Hey!
Man Still Greeting Partner With A Strong Hand On Back And A Whispered “G’Day Mate”
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A French Quarter young professional revealed this morning that her boyfriend of seven years
Uncle Darryl Asks Family To Excuse His French Before Launching Into Latest Tirade
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Christmas Eve drinks at 34 Benson Street in Betoota Heights is beginning to deteriorate
Local Gemini Is Incompatible With Leo Girlfriend According To Purple-Haired Auntie
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Short of running out the front door and throwing himself under the D45 bus
Coalition Announce Plan To Build Giant Coal-Powered Spiders As Seen In Wild Wild West
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Australia is not only under attack from homosexuals, fornicators and climate scientists, it’s
Country Boy Returning Home For Christmas Exhausts Tinder Pool In 35 Seconds
TRACEY BENDIGNER | Society | Contact Local man Adam Smithfield has today found himself in a different kind of drought to the