Brunswick Begins Construction On Big Dexie After Mildura Unveils Big Sultana
PETE CLARK | Melbourne | CONTACT The beloved Victorian border town of Mildura has unveiled Australia’s newest big thing, a giant
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Grandparents Unanimously Agree Living Room Could Do With Another Loud Ticking Clock
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact An elderly couple have today agreed to add another loud ticking clock to their living room,
Bloke Dating A Girl From Northern England Says Goodbye To His White Sheets
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A bloke who just started dating an English girl has unfortunately had to give up ever
Flat Toilet Roll Dispenser Great For Snorting Cocaine And One Million Streams Of E Coli
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A couple of woo girls have this week inadvertently lined their nasal cavities with faecel matter,
Unemployed Millionaire’s Son Confidently Announces Plan To Revolutionise Industry He’s Never Worked In
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A 23 year old bloke from Betoota’s French Quarter district has this week proudly declared
Oh No! Family In Panic Mode As Retired Boomer Graduates From Lotto Tickets To Scratchies
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT POKIES AREN’T FAR OFF NOW: A Betoota family is on high alert as retired mum
SuperCoach Just The Bloke Version Of Playing The Sims
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A woman sick of copping shit for loving the Sims has this week lashed out at
Cost Of Living Crisis: Nation’s Mums Can Only Afford Half Kilo Of Mince They Have No Plans For Yet
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT The world you grew up in is dead but not in the cool Tupac way where
Inner-City Leftie Furious That Hazard Reduction Fires Have Caused Off-Season Hay Fever
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Spring has come to Betoota as hazard reduction fires have brought a rare off-season hay
Dog That Was Meant To Protect Family From Crime Wave Asks Burglar To Play Frisbee
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT Like any bloke insecure about his need to provide income and protection to his family, Betoota
IOC Finally Gives NZ A Chance To Win Medals Outside Women’s Power Throwing, Adds Manu Bombs To Diving Events
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT The International Olympic Committee has announced a groundbreaking decision to add manu bombs to the Olympic
Local Millennial Extremely Proud Of Herself After Taking Public Transport Instead Of A $15 Uber
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A Betoota Heights woman is really shaking things up this week, by completely transforming the way
Local Kebab Shop Owner Nostalgic For The Rivers Of Gold That Came With The 2016 HSP Craze
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT On a slow day at Brothers 5-Star Kebab House, local business owner Mehmet Balik (56)