Local Tight Arse Needs Two Wallets To Carry All His Coffee Stamp Cards
KEITH T. DENNET | South | Contact A local tightarse is once again defending his fiscal proclivities this week, in the face
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Rental Agent Checking It’s Cool If Tradie Arrives Sometime Between 7am-6pm Any Day Next Week
LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT After finally getting around to fulfilling a maintenance request, local rental agent Jmaine Corsair (28) has
Hometown Funny Guy’s Entire Artillery Of One-Liners Found To Be Plagiarised From Reg Reagan
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A local ex-footy star turned menace-to-society has today been accused of plagiarising his entire sense of
“Track!” Yells Old Ass Man When The Chillis Break Into Deep Cut From Their 1991 Album Blood Sugar Sex Magik
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite young lefties having a sook that the Red Hot Chilli Peppers (who are playing the
Bloke Who Missed Referendum Meeting To Attend Pell’s Funeral Demands More Details Once Again
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s Opposition Leader has today revealed he’s getting tired of repeating himself. Peter
War Criminal Mourns Pedophile
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In some sad news from the Harbour city of Sydney, a war criminal has been forced
“Whoever Made This Needs To Be Sectioned Immediately” Says Bloke Seeing ‘Bad Boy Bubby’ For The First Time
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact After being told to watch 1993 Australian cult classic picture Bad Boy Bubby by one of
Dutton Begins Gruelling Task Of Modernising Liberal Party By Attending Pell’s Funeral
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s Federal Opposition Leader has today rolled up his sleeves and set about trying
Pell Mourners Want Some Respect Because They’re Burying A Great Pedo Protector Today
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Some old cunt from Sydney has asked protestors at St Mary’s Cathedral to “show some
Missing Radioactive Capsule Immediately Found By Truck Driver’s Mum After She Has A Proper Look
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact In some good news, it can be confirmed that the tiny radioactive capsule that went missing
Man Leaving Court All Of A Sudden Worried About Spreading Germs And The Glare
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local man left court today after being convicted of a reprehensible offence that saw him
“Oh Great” Sighs Pell After Learning That He’s Bunking With Vlad The Impaler For Eternity
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT As the Australian Catholic Church heavyweights, Murdoch media goons and the least PR-savy members of the
“Just Drop It Fuck Ya” – Short Mate Doesn’t Have An Issue With Being Vertically Challenged Okay
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT It’s not fucking funny, alright. That’s the message that came out of a Betoota