Local Man Goes Straight From Footy To Pub After A Quick Shower In A Can
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT A time poor local man has squeezed the maximum amount of juice out of his Saturday
Local News
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$36 Bunch Of Market Flowers Temporarily Eases Tensions Over Last Night’s Blow Out
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact A quick-thinking boyfriend has successfully pacified an unimpressed girlfriend this morning with an
Micro-Influencer Scours Bookstore For Provocative Book Cover With Instagram Potential
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact One of Betoota’s most unfollowed micro-influencers has been spotted out shopping today,
December’s Pay Check Already Starting To Stretch
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact A local party girl is putting herself on a two-minute noodle diet this
“Wicked Went For Too Long” Whinges Boyfriend, While Watching Cricket Match That Lasts 2 Months
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact A stupid dumb boyfriend who doesn’t appreciate the talents of Cynthia Erivo has
Local Bloke Knows He’s Pissed When He Starts Using One Eye To Craft A Text Message
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT A Betoota Heights bloke has today reached the ‘no going back’ zone at his work Christmas
Chalmers Resigns After Losing Entire Future Fund On Hawk Tuah Meme Coin
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Treasurer Jim Chalmers has spectacularly resigned this today after losing the entire Future Fund
Gay Friends Enter “Late Night Music Video Viewing” Phase Of The Evening
CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT In what has become a time-honoured tradition, local friends Nick, John, and Shani found themselves
Meteorologists Confirm That Regardless Of Weather Conditions, The First Saturday Of Summer Is An Absolute Day For It
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact A local expert from Betoota’s Bureau Of Meteorology has today reiterated the fact that the
Old Workmate Kidding Themselves If They Think You’ll Be Catching Up Before Christmas
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact A local bloke has executed some exceptional forward defense today as he casually blocks
Local Cafe Turns $4 Coffee Into $8.50 “Iced Latte” With Magic Handful of Ice Cubes
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | Contact A snotty cafe in the French Quarter has put on a spectacular magic show
‘I Have Such A Girl Crush On Her’ Says Woman Unaware She Has A Bit Of Fruit In Her Salad
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact Local woman Gabrielle Flores today stands accused of being in denial, after announcing she has a
Local Bloke Wishes He Could Sit In A Dimly Lit Corner Of A Bar Looking All Rugged And Mysterious
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | Contact A bloke who’s been feeling pretty disillusioned with his white collar life has found himself