Woman Officially Feeling Old After Every Actress She Googles Is Now Younger Than Her
SANDY FRASER | Youth | CONTACT Ashling Murphy (31) is experiencing a second wave of aging terror after coming to find every
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“Argh! Is It Friday, Yet?” Asks Boring Coworker Who’s Gonna Work On Saturday Anyway
LAURY LUCKNOW | Local News | Contact A French Quarter office person has asked a fellow office person if it’s Friday
New Study Launched Into Why Local Buses Magically Appear The Moment Someone Lights A Cigarette
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Morris Lupus ran for the 9:01 am L45 to Betoota Green Junction this morning, something
Local Mother Still Reeling From News Her Son’s New Girlfriend Is A ‘Penciller’
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A prominent Betoota Grove mother of four was forced to have an after-dinner lie down against
Upper-Middle-Class-Stay-At-Home-Mum Picks Up On Guest’s Lack Of Long Forgotten Table Manners
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A prominent Betoota Grove mother of four was forced to have an after-dinner lie down against
“Nice To Meet You, Greg!” Says Man Who’ll Forget Greg’s Name In 30 Seconds Time
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact As blood sugars run low late on this horrible yet idle Thursday afternoon, two local lawyers
Local Tattoo Parlour Investigated For Not Having Links To Bikie Gangs
GWEN ORKEN | Local News | Contact A late model Toyota Prius parked outside a popular local tattoo parlour has sparked a
Why Do Only Upper-Middle-Class-Family-With-Labradors Celebrate Halloween?
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Diamantina Shire has launched an investigation into why only predominantly-upper-middle-class-families-with-labrador-retrievers celebrate the traditional American holiday
Local Insecure Friend Waits Patiently To One Up The Story You Just Told
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Regaling his close friends, at their request, for the fourth time this year about an ‘epic’
Studio Executives Gather To Decide Which Classic Movie They’ll Remake Next
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Move over original thought, there’s a new, real moneymaker in town. A number of leading
Local Unlucky Man Develops Common Cold During Common Heat Wave
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite taking every precaution, one North Betootanese accountant was forced to take a precious sick day
Local Sunday-Sessioner Under Impression He Got Away With It
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Atoning for Friday on Saturday is nothing compared to paying the price for Saturday on Sunday.
Office Tight-Arse Furious He Forgot To Sign Card For Present He Actually Put In For
DONNA HOLDEN | Culture | CONTACT Michael Kelsen, 27, has been left kicking himself after forgetting to sign the card for a