Man Who ‘Doesn’t Do Politics’ Mysteriously Has Strong Political Opinions

CONSTANCE RIVERA | Grievances | CONTACT

Betoota Heights man Baz Petros (39) has once again assured friends that he “doesn’t do politics” before launching into a passionate, factually dubious rant about interest rates, immigration, and the price of a schooner.

Baz, who insists that “both sides are as bad as each other,” somehow manages to maintain a consistent set of opinions that align suspiciously well with one particular side of politics. Despite his claim of being politically neutral, he is more than happy to spend entire afternoons angrily shaking his head at the “media”.

“He reckons he hates political discussions,” said mate Josh, “but if you get him going, he’ll give you a 20-minute speech on how the country is being ruined by people he refuses to name directly.”

Baz, a self-described ‘battler’ who owns an investment property and a jet ski, often laments how ‘normal Aussies’ are doing it tough while simultaneously opposing any policies that might improve their situation.

“He says he just wants common-sense policies,” added another mate, Jake. “Which I think means whatever he agrees with at that moment.”

Despite his frequent political outbursts, Baz maintains that he’s not actually interested in politics. “Nah mate, I’m not one of those political people,” he insists. “I just call it how I see it.”

Baz was overheard explaining how the housing crisis could be solved if “people just worked harder and stopped buying takeaway coffee.”