Chinese Spy Tasked With Compromising Billionaire Len Ainsworth Ends Up Addicted To Lucky 88 Instead
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Chinese intelligence operative sent to compromise pokies billionaire Len Ainsworth has spent $138,
Latest news (Page 267)
Local Wingnut Considers Pre-Bullying His Son So He’s Desensitised To It By Kindy
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A father in Betoota Heights has sparked controversy this week after announcing he has
Schools Around The Country Urged To Update Reading Curriculum For Tik Tok Generation
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT Schools across the country are being urged to modernise their reading curriculum in a bid to
Podcast Bro No Longer Needs Ice Baths Or Saunas After Old Flirt At The Pub Tells Him He’s Handsome
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A 20-something middle class white man has today been saved from spiralling further into the
Ley Admits Female Quotas Are Contentious As She Needs To Placate Liberal Faction That Feels Women Should Shut Up, Cook Dinner, And Raise Children
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Opposition leader Sussan Ley has used a media appearance this morning to admit that
Landlords Prepare For Week Of Heavy Storms By Blocking All Incoming Calls
MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT Landlords and rental agents across the east coast have rushed to block their tenants from all
‘Once In 100 Year’ Weather Events Reclassified As ‘Biannual Weather Patterns’
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The poor old North Coast of NSW is today battening down hatches and filling up sandbags
Sydney Braces For Their Quadrennial Schadenfreude Storm
ERROL PAKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Residents across Greater Sydney have begun preparing themselves for what meteorologists and tabloid journalists
Local Office Worker Receives Daily Steam Notification From Mate Who Works From Home
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT A steam notification on her work laptop has confirmed a bloke’s long held suspicion, that
KNEECAP Agrees To Truce With English Imperialists For Duration Of British And Irish Lions Rugby Tour
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Despite being hauled before the UK courts on terrorism charges, the firebrand Irish rap trio KNEECAP
Local Bloke Forced To Ride A Guangzhou Gelding After Blowing The Bag Again
ERROL PAKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A local bloke who overestimated both his personal resilience and the Australian winter has
Woman With Winter Blues Informed There’s A Psychiatrist Appointment Available In Three Months Time
EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | CONTACT A woman struggling with a case of seasonal affective disorder – distastefully known as ‘SAD’ – has unfortunately
SBS Politely Check In With Optus About Whether They Could Maybe Have Some EPL Rights Pls
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The nation’s premiere commercial public broadcaster has today thrown it’s hat in the ring