Local Girl Spends Sunday Night Calculating How Much She Spent On Beating Hangover
KEITH T. DENNETT | New South | CONTACT Head noise is blaring in the mind of a local girl this evening as
Latest news (Page 1193)
Doomed Student Gives Up Halfway Through Exam And Begins Calculating Worst-Case-Scenario Score
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT Local student Isla Parker is royally fucked. She should have learnt her lesson on the last
From The Archives: “He’s Going To Be Fine” Says Blood-Soaked Jackie Kennedy
CLYDE OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT FROM THE ARCHIVES: DALLAS, TEXAS – 22/11/1963 The American fake news commentators are in full
Sony, Microsoft Welcome Pre-Christmas Tax Cuts To Arrive The Same Time As Their New Consoles
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Tech giants Sony and Microsoft have welcomed the planned tax cuts laid out in
Bloke Who Studied Economic Geography At Uni Says We Need To Focus On Relevant Degrees
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT Prime Minister Scott Morrison has today spoken about the proposed changes to the university funding model,
Trump Supporters Pray Their President Only Has A Mild Case Of The Virus They Don’t Believe In
CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The militant supporters of Donald Trump have taken his advice today and are refusing to let
Broke Senior Citizen Gets His Own Hospital Bed As America Begins Trialling Free Healthcare
WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The United States Government has today shocked its citizens by announcing it has begun trialling free
Attenborough Changes Tune On Fossil Fuels After Learning Australia’s Recovery Depends On Gas
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact British naturalist David Attenborough has reportedly changed his mind regarding fossil fuels after being
Government Gives Wealthy A Tax Cut To Stimulate Fledgling Exchange-Traded Fund Industry
ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One key aspect of this impending budget is the tax cuts given to all
Western Australia’s Fiery Words, The Gold Coast & A Naughty Local Boyfriend – October 6
Clancy Overell and Wendell Hussey run through another day in news, live from the Budgy Smuggler Booth.
Christian Hen’s Night Kicks Up A Notch As Kimberly Gets A Spare
GREGOR REDPATH | Rugby | Contact There was a time when Peta Washbrook regretted walking into the Betoota Heights Hillsong Church – but
Painful Hangnail Discarded Until Man Feels Brave Enough To Have Another Go At It
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT Local man Ryan Wells is the type of bloke who secretly believes picking the skin around
Scratchy Blanket Mysteriously Unearthed From Back Of Linen Cupboard For Overly Drunken Mate
EFFIE BATEMAN | BRISBANE | CONTACT Despite their better judgement, and perhaps in an attempt to reclaim what they perceived to be