I Mean, We Could've Just Taxed Gas

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Federal Treasurer Jim Chalmers has handed down the Albanese government's fifth and most ambitious budget yet, with major changes to both Negative gearing and capital gains taxes.

Chalmers has also laid out plans for cost of living relief, housing, healthcare, energy and the broader economy - while also 'finding savings' where he can.

Today, 'expert analysts' are screaming into the void, as the the status quo is slightly disrupted by a weird and foreign emphasis on helping young people, as opposed to protecting assetts.

Australia now braces itself for a screeching and irrational debate in the days ahead - as economists, industry groups, lobby groups, the Federal Opposition and wealth-hoarding baby boomers attempt to make the argument that there was nothing wrong with a world where house prices shoot up by 400% in one decade.

Meanwhile, the less sexy aspects of the Federal Budget see tax breaks removed for small businesses and start-ups - as well as a razor blade being taken to the National Disability Insurance Scheme.

Disabled Australians will now wear the inhumanity of having their services and independence stripped back, with the government utilising A.I to assess claims, rather than empathetic human beings. This will be buried under the attacks on brown people starting dodgy NDIS agencies, and attention-seeking hypochondriacs attempting to milk payments for obscure and hard-to-diagnose personality disorders.

On top of this, the working class have been thrown a sugar hit of a $300 cash payment for all wage earners at 'some point in the next few years' - as the government scrambles to figure out where they will find the extra funds to pay for a relief package that actually costs more than the entire budget's savings.

With the media noise already at feverpitch over this budget, the vast majority of Australians will weather the choppy seas ahead with the knowledge that all of this could be avoided if our government just grew a pair and taxed the major royalty-dodging mulinational corporations that pillage Australian soil for highly profitable resources and send the money off overseas to oligarchs and foreign shareholders.

Just a 25% tax on natural gas could've solved most of this... But it seems the resources sector is a much scarier opponent than the Federal Opposition or voters.