LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Empty nester Alan Houston (58) would certainly describe himself as ‘a bit miffed’ today after having to deal with his local council despite the fact he’s a decent bloke and did nothing to deserve it.

Wanting to build a granny flat in his backyard to accommodate his ageing mother in law, Singh did right by his neighbours by sharing his plans with his local council in order to get permission to build on his own property that he paid for.

Well according to Houston, he might as well have proposed the building of a super brothel where the councillor’s children are the sole employees as they rejected his proposal with the sort of mirth and small power that can really only be associated with council employees.

“I thought I was being polite to them in my emails but I must have offended them because they kept referring to me as Mr/Mrs Houston even after I told them it’s Mr and Alan is also fine,” said Houston, who in his lifetime has helped repaint every public owned asset in his town.

“They joked that they were doing me a big favour by rejecting my proposal because now my mother in law didn’t have to live with me anymore. I like my mother in law! She’s a good person! When she moves in we are going to see a new movie together every Tuesday.”

Although Houston states none of his neighbours care about his proposed granny flat, he wanted to do the right thing by checking with the council first but states he is regretting every interaction with his council he has ever had.

“I should never have paid that stupid dog tax either! When was I ever going to see that money back? Why did I have to pay the council because I have a dog when the dog park is just a park where you accept the high level of shit on the ground?” 

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