As Queensland high schools begin celebrating their year 12 formals, the 34 different bright pink stretch hummerzine companies in the South East Corner say they are completely booked out until after the Gold Coast 600.

With exams around the corner, excited high schoolers across the nation are being treated to a little bit of glam before the studying begins.

For Gold Coast senior students, this means fake tans, fake nails, fake lips, pin-striped suit fittings and stretch motherfucking hummerzines.

The need for every single Gold Coast high schoolers to arrive in style at their big night is so important that rental companies say they have been booked out for months.

Local bright pink stretch hummerzine rental company owner, Jayceon (55), says the three formals over the weekend saw the entire industry stretched well beyhond capacity.

“Had to call in a couple more bright pink stretch hummerzines  from Brisbane” he said.

“Even then there was a couple of girls left in tears because we had to put ’em in a stretch commodore”

Bright blue hummerzines were also brought in as substitutes, while some students just had to arrive on their back of their dad’s Harleys.

One of the distraught students who missed out, Tay’asha, says her Thursday night formal was the worst night of her life.

“How can they run out of bright pink stretch hummerzines!” she told our reporters.

“There’s more bright pink stretch hummerzine on the Gold Coast then cabs. Fucking bullshit”




Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here