Dodgy Tobacconist Chain Acquires David Jones Building

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACT

Sydney's historic David Jones building has reportedly been acquired by Egyptian based Tobacconist chain DubaiCloudz after the department store announced it was going into administration.

The landmark CBD property is set to undergo a major refurbishment, with its traditional luxury retail floors replaced by an ambitious selection of disposable vapes, imported soft drinks and phone chargers that stop working after three days.

DubaiCloudz, which currently operates 47 suspiciously similar shopfronts across Sydney, says the acquisition represents an exciting new chapter for the city's retail landscape.

“We've always admired David Jones” said a company spokesperson standing beneath a flickering LED sign.

Under the proposed redevelopment, the building's famous ground floor cosmetics department will become a brightly lit counter selling rolling papers, novelty lighters and approximately 900 different flavours of an unheard of foreign energy drink called Ice Tornado.

The former designer clothing floors will reportedly be converted into storage space, while the entire basement will be reserved for a man who is apparently the owner's cousin from Jordan.

Heritage advocates have expressed concerns about the plans, although DubaiCloudz has assured the public that the original facade will remain intact, apart from six illuminated signs advertising over priced American cereal brands.