“You Promised Australia You’d Change!” Says Poor Jenny After Seeing Scotty’s Search History

LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Trouble in almost paradise was stirred this week as Jenny Morrison made the morality-killing mistake of looking at her husband’s search history.

Earlier in the week, Scotty from Marketing made the not at all unreliable decrease that he ‘swears he can change’, perfectly fulfilling the on again/off again boyfriend persona he has been to the Australian people.

However, a quick look at Scotty’s Google search history confirms that the Big Fella In Chief plans on jetting off to Hawaii regardless of the election result.

Luckily, only one person was shocked that the Prime Minister told a lie; none other than his wife and de facto moral compass Jenny.

“I thought you said you’d changed!” said Jenny, pacing around Kirribilli House with an open laptop, eventually finding the PM hiding behind a curtain.

“Stop saying you promised me and the girls, you promised 25 million lowlives you’d be a good Prime Minister!”

At the time of writing, Jenny is now beginning to doubt her husband’s other claims including that he did eat the vegetarian lasagne that was left for him one night and did not indeed get Maccas on the way home and chuck the lasagne in the bin.

“I should have known when the rubbish was taken out. When has he ever taken the rubbish out?”