Woman At Airport Pretends Not To Care About Baggage At Carousel So It Comes Out Faster

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A woman standing at an airport baggage carousel has reportedly adopted a "IDGAF" attitude of total indifference in the hope that her suitcase will appear sooner.

Emily Parker (29) touched down late Sunday night and immediately employed her long-held belief that luggage can sense desperation. 

Rather than standing close to the belt like a rookie, Parker leaned casually against a pillar, scrolled her phone, and stared into the middle distance as if she didn’t even check a bag.

“She hasn’t looked up once” said a fellow passenger. 

“She really doesn't give a shit” said another

According to witnesses, Parker deliberately positioned herself just far enough away to suggest she was waiting for someone else, while keeping her peripheral vision locked on the carousel. 

Any sudden movement of black hard-shell luggage was met with a casual glance, then back to her phone.

Experts say the strategy stems from the widely accepted airport law that baggage handlers factor in the owners desperation before choosing which bag to chuck on the carrosel next. 

Standing too close, making eye contact with the belt, or audibly sighing are all believed to delay arrival by several minutes.

Parker also reportedly refused to acknowledge multiple identical bags, convinced the carousel was testing her resolve.