Tight-Arse Mate Not That Hungry Unless You’re Having Trouble With Those Chips

TRACEY BENDINGER | Social Nuances | Contact

A pub lunch catch up has been spoiled today by a friend who is incapable of confronting the financial responsibilities required of an adult.

“Oh, I’m not that hungry, I’ll just get a beer” said Ken Butcher (27), in a whiney high pitched voice.

Ken smiled, but the remainder of the group exchanged knowing looks – even the bar tender.

A short while later the meals arrived and everyone appeared to be extremely satisfied with their meals. One person in particular, Soph Longstaff, had momentarily placed her burger back on to his plate, a gesture interpreted by Ken as her moment to move into phase two.

“Are you going to finish that?”

“Oh yeah, definitely, you can have some chips though, if you want” Said Sophie, only politely offering. She then looked on in disbelief as Ken devoured the remaining chips and aioli that were on her plate.

The Advocate reached out to Sophie after the incident to get her view on the treachery.

“Oh mate. Every fucking time. I was going to pick away at my chips, that I paid for, until we left the pub. She’s a seagull. Give her one chip, she’ll take the whole plate.”

More to come.