South East Queensland Facing Extreme Toilet Water Shortage As Locals Embrace Alternative Medicine

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT

Bathrooms around the wider Brisbane area are today buckling under the pressure of a big couple of days.

In the wake of the Broncos stunning NRL and NRLW wins, a severe shortage of empty toilets has been reported across the South East Corner of the state.

The cause of the shortage is alleged to be gigalitres of consumed toilet water, following NRL superstar Reece Walsh’s heroics on Sunday night.

For those who don’t spend time on the internet or watching the NRL, Reese TV made headlines in the weeks leading up to finals for posting a video of him drinking out of a toilet to help ‘heal an injury.’

The video of course made plenty of headlines and lead to Walsh clarifying that he installed the toilet himself – insinuating that it definitely wasn’t christened by a random plumber or two.

The man who has since dubbed himself ‘The Plumber’ then backed it up through the finals series, putting in a batch of incredible performances that resulted in him winning the Clive Churchill Medal for best on ground.

Celebrating with a couple of toilet props, the exuberant spilling over of joy has since lead to the a legion of toilet fans draining their own toilets.

“I’ve been holding a shit for a couple of days now,” said Everton Park Broncos fan Riley Gibson.

“But hey, it’s all worth it.”

“20 years between premierships is a long time.”

“And erasing the pain of 2015 and 2023. I’ll drink toilet water to that. It helps with recovery, ya know”

Emergency works are underway to ensure the Wivenhoe can service the parched toilets.

More to come.