Report Finds Y Number Plates The Most Interesting Thing About Canberra

TRACEY BENDINGER | Society | Contact

For years Canberrans have been trying to convince the rest of the country that it is actually pretty cool now, and that there is more to it than Questacon. However, in a somewhat Judas move, the department of Arts & Culture has today revealed that the only thing that sets apart Canberra is its Y starting number plates.

The brief 10-page tax-payer-funded report stated that while Canberra did have some notable restaurants now, the majority of new bars and restaurants were just like the ones you’d find in Sydney or Melbourne, but not as good.

Understandably, the report has ruffled a few feathers in the communities that have worked hard to make Canberra more than a soulless sprawl of roundabouts.

“Maybe if the pricks who did that report ever left Barton they’d see we’re actually making a difference here.” fumed the owner of a popular city bar who wished to remain anonymous.

According to a spokesperson from the department, the report was the result of a very thorough 3-year assessment of the nation’s capital, whereby they wined and dined at every cool new establishment on the tax-payer’s dime.

“Look, we tried our best to prove that there is more to Canberra. But, when you pull it all back the only thing that sets apart the capital is the Y number plates. Everything else is just a wannabe version of another city.”

Harsh words, ones that The Advocate does not necessarily agree with but must publish in the name of journalistic integrity.

More to come.