Pampered Inner City Schoo-Moodle Has Better Diet Than Most Suburban Children

KEITH T. DENNET | New South | Contact

A local bloke is coming to terms with his place in the family hierarchy today, as he realises his family dog is fed better than he is.

Trekking in from Betoota Lakes to visit his Nimby parents who live in a five-bedroom terrace in the French Quarter, Will Weyman (28) has discovered his parents spend upwards of $200 a week, feeding their new schoo-moodle “Luna” a pretty fancy diet.

Opening up the family fridge in search of a snack, Will found shelves of home-cooked puppy meals, meat stocks plus packets of grass fed “turkey and veggie bowls” from some uppity start-up that makes organic meals for dogs with gut issues.

“Mum, is this chicken good to eat, can I throw it in a sandwich?”, called out Will, as he sniffed a tupperware container of steamed chicken breast.

“No. No! That’s not yours, it’s chicken in bone broth for the dogs. You can’t have that!” snapped Will’s mum Linda.

Feeling a soft wet tongue lick his ankles, Will looked down to see “Luna”, a designer schoo-moodle his parents just bought for $6,000 from a breeder in Byron Bay, trying to win his heart.

Staring into its adorable soft eyes, Will couldn’t help but feel conflicted, knowing that this fluffy little shit was getting better lunches and dinners than he ever got as a kid.

“Love, there’s crackers in the pantry, have some of those with cheese and vegemite,” offered Will’s Mum.

“Just don’t eat the cubed cheese in the ziplock bag, that’s for Luna’s training walks! It’s Mersey Vale cheddar, if I feed her the cheap Aldi cheese she soils herself all over the carpet.”

More to come.