ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk has moved to include the Byron Bay area in the Queenslander border travel ban after learning all of Sydney is currently packed into the seaside town.

Hoardes of white, well-healed Sydney yuppies have crammed themselves into Byron Bay in recent weeks which lead the Queensland Government to make the tough call.

“I know this will be hard for the locals but in the best interests of Queensland, we’re going to have to put a stop to people from the Byron Bay area coming to Queensland,” said the Premier.

“They’ve had these filthy Sydney people crawling all over them for over a month now. Coughing on things, destroying the property market with their wealth, feeling too self-important to sign into venues,”

“The risk is just too great. In terms of Sydney, it’s just a budget version of Melbourne that’s somehow more expensive according to my government,”

“We’ll reevaluate the situation when Byron goes back to whatever their new normal will be. Remember, if you didn’t come out of your mother in Byron Bay, you aren’t a local – you’re a part of the problem.”

The Advocate sought comment from the Mayor of Byron Bay Council but was unable to reach them.

Sources close to the Mayor say he’s been unable to find a park near the Council Offices and has been doing laps of the block for the past seven hours.

More to come.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here